Procrastination and Resolutions

As I'm sitting on the couch in my sweatpants and coffee stained t-shirt enjoying one of my last days at home before the chaos resumes, I'm contemplating what many of us are perhaps thinking about so close to the New Year. I have resolutions, things that I would like to see myself accomplish in the year 2014, but the how of accomplishing those things seem a tad bit daunting.

First, the obstacles. I'm a terrible procrastinator. When I have that momentary spurt of energy/motivation, I can do anything that comes across my mind. I can have my house clean, my errands finished, all the phone calls to the doctors offices and insurance companies and registrar's offices knocked out in a couple of hours, thus allowing myself a nice and relaxing congratulatory snack on the couch for a job well done.

Unfortunately, those days are few and far between. Maybe it's the life of a newlywed, but my house is messy more than it is clean, with dirty dishes piled in the sink, clutter scattered all over the desk, coffee table, and that weird metal thing next to the stove that Brian brought home one day, saying, "This way I won't have to put my stuff on the stove!"

Right.

And, after a few heated arguments about whose job it was to do what, and who did the majority of the cleaning, I finally did what I had been threatening to do for the past six months. I made a chore chart. An honest to goodness, fourth grade, you-get-a-sticker, chore chart that divides the daily household chores (washing dishes, folding laundry, sweeping, etc) between my husband and I. That way, both of us are held accountable by what we needed to do for the day around the house, neither of us have the excuse that they are the only one doing their job, and it results in a nice looking house to come home to.

For those of you thinking that the chore chart is juvenile, you may be right, but hey, if it helps avoid an argument and cleans my house, I'm not going to snub my nose at it over semantics.

And then, guess what guys? I friggin' procrastinated doing my chores!

I had them laid out, right there, on the chalkboard, plain as day. There are only 5 things that I have to do daily: wash the dishes, sweep the living room and the bathroom, clear off the coffee table, fold and put away laundry, and dust the surfaces.

And I didn't do it!

The first day I wrote it, I thought, "I'm going to wait until Brian gets home from work. I can't do my half until he does his." An excuse this was, but I'll let this one slide because that fat little prideful devil on my left shoulder is looking up from her book and giving me a smile of encouragement. If he didn't clean, why should I?

Okay, moving on. The next day, Brian comes home, sees his chore chart, and without complaining, knocks out all the chores on his side within 15 minutes, and he's free to sit down and play a round of Battlefield without me being able to complain about anything. I sat on the couch, engrossed in a book that I just had to know what happened next, and told myself that after two more chapters, I would get up and clean.

Nope.

I'm one of those people who thinks that books happen in real time, like I have in front of me a little window into a world that will only exist for a short amount of time. If I put down the book, I will miss out on whatever is about to happen and be completely confused when I pick it back up later. Logically, I know that's not the case, but once again, that fat little devil stares unblinkingly at the book and blindly reaches out for some popcorn, dropping a few pieces on the floor in the process. Well that's just one more thing I have to clean up.

Okay, the next day. The next day, I woke up bright and early to the slightly desperate sounds of my dogs trying to hold their bladders, stumbled sleepily out of bed and to the backyard where I closed the gate, and then I promptly fell back in bed and slept for another three hours. Say what? I never sleep until noon, but with the Good Lord as my witness, sleep until noon I did. I woke up in a panic, realizing my dogs were missing because Maya is a bit of a Houdini genius and had opened the gate, and then had them come back as soon as I got dressed and in the car to go looking for them.

By that point, knowing that I had to be at work in just another three hours, I thought to myself, I don't have any time at all to do my chores today. I'll do them when I get home. I went to work where I played and cuddled with the twins, enjoying every last second of them before I go back to school full time in another two weeks, fed, changed, and put them to bed, and then proceeded to wash their dishes, because that's a part of my regular job description and I wanted to do something nice for the family that wasn't angry at me for dropping the "you need to find a new nanny in four weeks over the Christmas holiday" bombshell. I ended up not getting home until close to midnight, and by that point, I was falling asleep standing up and the thought of having to do chores before going to bed was exhausting.

I'll do them tomorrow.

Are you seeing a pattern here, readers? The procrastination is terrible. I did eventually do them last night (the last tomorrow that I mentioned) when Brian mentioned that I hadn't done them in two days when he had already done his share, and now my house looks nice. I fully intend to complete my portion of the chores everyday, but then, don't we all begin that way?

Diets, exercise, workload, etc. That's what New Years Resolutions are always about. How can we turn over a new leaf, become a new person through determination and perseverance, and develop healthy habits that change our lives for the better in the process?

This year there are a lot of things I would like to accomplish. I would like to succeed in school. I would like to keep my house clean. I would like to have a sexy, passionate marriage with my husband. I would like to be healthy physically. I'm not overweight by any stretch of the imagination, but I tend to come home after a day of crawling around with the babies, sit on the couch, and read. That's it. No going for a jog, no anything. Back before the wedding, I had signed Brian and I both up to run in the Color Me Rad 5K, and since I was equally out of shape then, I began running for it every day. And I mean every day. I would come home from class, change clothes, put on the "Couch to 5k" app (I highly recommend this app for anyone who has getting into shape on their list for the New Year) and then go run. By the end of a few weeks, Brian and I went running for four miles. FOUR MILES! True, I had to walk and catch my breath a few times, but regardless, I did something that I hadn't done since that painful year of track in the 8th grade where I was the only girl running middle distance and therefore the only person left on the track at the end of Tuesday's two-mile-run practice.

And when that 5k came around, I ran the whole thing, fast walking only once to drink some water. And I was insanely proud of myself for that. But after that day, I haven't run since.


My point is, my goals are praiseworthy. But excuses come in all shapes and sizes. That fat little devil on my shoulder would like nothing better than for me to sit on the couch reading, and man, that sounds super amazing. But I know I can no longer afford to give in to that devil. My marriage, my mental and physical health all ride on me flipping that little devil the finger and getting off my ass and doing something.

So, let's not wait for the New Year to begin new habits. Saying you're going to wait for the New Year is just another excuse, one more procrastination that makes it that much harder to do than if you close your laptop, put down your phone, and just do it.